Ink Pots and Authors
by SassafrasTea
Summary: Modern AU! Jiraiya is an author and Tsunade his much put upon literary agent. Together the sass and insults fly as they try to work together.
1. Chapter 1

Tsunade stopped in the lobby of the apartment building.

Lipstick, check.

Stockings straight, check.

No visible panty lines, check.

She was on the way to see her most notorious client Jiraiya, a number one best seller of over a dozen books and a complete and total letch. Not only was he a letch, he was a lazy letch. Tsunade punched the elevator button and rode to his penthouse is seething silence, her aura of anger causing any poor soul in the box to suddenly decide to take the stairs.

The blonde gave a sigh. If only she hadn't been to so damn eager to take him on as an author, but that first novel of his enamored her. It was full of adventure. When Tsunade sat down to read it, she was the gusty ninja fighting to save her village. She had fought and snarled with the other editors to get him signed to her. Her stubborn will continued to bite her in the ass.

The Gusty Ninja was a one off. Jiraiya, it seemed, was more interested in writing soft core porn. Tsunade considered herself a serious editor and having to red ink, draft after draft of people in various positions and making notes like no one was that limber, was grating on her. To top it all off, The Pervy Guru had decided to not grace their scheduled meeting with his presence. Her knuckles rapped on his door. If only it was his head instead.

"Jiraiya, I know you are in there. We had a meeting this morning. A meeting you missed."

Her phone started ringing. Tsunade picked it up with a sigh. This was an old game between them.

"Hello," she said into the mobile.

"Tsunade" a masculine voice said back, a voice she heard on the phone and through the door. "I forgot about our meeting, I'm actually out. Funny story-"

The blonde powerhouse had had enough. She kicked the door so hard it shuddered on its hinges. "I can hear you through the door, asshole. Now open it before I break it down."

The door handle jiggled as it was unlocked and it slowly opened to show an almost fearful white haired author looking at her.

"Hello Tsunade." Jiraiya said, feigning innocence. "What a pleasant surprise."

The blonde snorted and pushed past him. His apartment was the same as always. She knew he had a cleaning service; she set it up herself after coming in and sitting on a used condom. But there were still books and other unsavory paraphernalia scattered around the room. After gingerly checking her favored chair, Tsunade sat down and opened her briefcase.

"You should make me some tea." She said, not looking up. "Since I was nice enough to come all the way down here for you."

She finished setting up her workstation and a cup of tea appeared by her elbow. She felt his presence hovering and looked up to see him leaned over trying his best to see down her shirt. Tsunade leaned her head back and smiled mirthlessly at him.

"Do you seriously want me to punch you again? I'm starting to think you get off on it." She gestured to the seat beside her. "Sit down so we can get this paperwork sorted and I can go back to the real world."

Jiraiya sat across from her and they worked through the ends and outs of the paperwork involved with being a published and successful author. For once he was completely professional, courteous even as he got up to refill her tea. She knew something was up.

"Alright, Jiraiya," Tsunade said, the polite act was started to grate on her. "What is it?"

He had the nerve to blush slightly. "Well, Tsunade, I ahh… want to ask you out on a date." He said stumbling over his words.

The agent couldn't help it. She threw her head back and laughed. Clutching her stomach Tsunade got herself under enough control to huff out. "You can't be serious."

Jiraiya stood up and paced. His movement's jerky with anger. "I'm dead serious. I have that damn author's ball to go to and I want someone I can actually talk to going with me instead of some doxy in it for the champagne and the chance to get laid."

She whistled low, a bit speechless. "Is that why you are being so nice to me? You're trying to butter me up, so I'll go with you."

"No… well yes" he confessed.

This was perfect. Tsunade gave a bright smile as she sp[rung her trap. "I will go with you on two conditions. One you make to our next meeting. Two, we talk about a sequel to The Gusty Ninja. Do we have a deal?"

His smile was dazzling. "My beautiful Princess," he proclaimed, "We most definitely have a deal. I'll pick out your dress."

Tsunade gave him an ugly look and stood gathering her briefcase. "Thank you but no. I'll text you my address and you can pick me up the night of and drop me back home directly after. I'm not… what was that word you used, a doxy wanting booze and certainly not wanting a lay."


	2. Chapter 2

There was a whirlwind of activity leading up to the author's ball. Tsunade lost herself in it and between her work with other authors and the production company that was sniffing around with thoughts on adopting one of Jiraiya's books into a made for TV movie. When the night of the event rolled around, it was an exhausted literary agent that looked through her closest for something to wear.

Her perusal of what to wear was interrupted by a knock on the door followed by the chime of the doorbell. Whiskey colored eyes widened as she looked at the clock. Jiraiya was fifteen minutes early and she was still in a towel with tangled wet hair down her back. The blonde gave serious thought to ignoring him long enough to get ready, but even that was shattered by the vibrating of her cell on the dresser.

Tsunade ran down the hall and wrenched up her front door ready to yell at him for being early once in his life when the sight of flowers met her. Not roses that would be cliché, but a cheerful clutch of daisies instead. Her hand, the one not keeping her towel on, reached out to take them before meeting the amused stare of the white haired author.

"What," she ground out her body radiating its ill temper.

Jiraiya brought his now empty hand up to touch the end of his nose. "Nothing Tsunade, I was just wondering if that was your planned outfit for the evening. You look beautiful of course, but it might be a little cold to go in just a towel." His shoulders shook with suppressed amusement.

She glared up at him before turning and walking away, leaving Jiraiya to shut the door and follow her. He kept his eyes on her back, his author's mind already writing and rewriting the scene in his head. His mind eye tracing and following each drop of water from the tip of her hair, down curves padded by terry cloth before quietly splashing on the ground. The white haired man shook himself. He liked Tsunade, considered her a princess of an editor, all haughty and untouchable to his peasant self. Of course his lowly self couldn't stand by and watch her without wanting to reach out and touch, just to see royalty flustered.

"You're early." She stated bluntly walking into her kitchen long enough to set down the flowers. "I'll get dressed and we'll go and no you can't watch."

"You wound me." He said in reply. "I would never deem myself worthy to watching such beauty unwrap itself. Although, that towel… doesn't leave much to the imagination. I knew your legs were shapely Tsunade, but not that they were tanned perfection."

Her look was withering. The blonde huffed and walked away, shutting the door in his face and turning the lock with a decisive click.

Jiraiya ran his tongue around his teeth as he stared at the door. She was an enigma, all soft curves and sharp biting temper. It piqued his interest and made him want to know more, to know everything about her. He turned on his heels and strode into her kitchen.

He laughed to himself as he searched cabinets for something to put the flowers in. His editor evidently was not a cook. She seemed to only own one pot and it still had the sticker on it from wherever she got it. Large hands opened drawers as he shamelessly snooped. Tsunade it seemed liked chicken and wine. He would have to remember that when he could cajole her on another date with him.

He left the kitchen and walked through her hall to what he assumed was her living room. Dark eyes widened at the sight that greeted him. Her book collection was as big if not bigger than his own. Her walls were nothing but shelves crammed full of… it seemed every genre. He saw the big wing chair in the corner and book set beside it.

Curiosity gleamed as he picked up the familiar cover. Of course, of course it was his first book, the one that had brought her to him in the first place. Suddenly he wanted to write, not another ninja adventure but a love story, one with a temperamental blonde and the… well that was the kicker wasn't it. Who out there would be worthy of a princess?

Tsunade could hear his feet creak along the floor boards and the opening of cabinets. What was the man doing? She rolled her eyes and finished pulling up her hair. As long as he was occupied, she could get dressed in peace. She forwent her stockings in favor of open toed sandals that gave her an extra four inches in height and black dress that was simple in design, knee length and two wide straps holding it up. She wore no jewelry and topped everything off with a light colored wrap and her enormous hand bag.

The purse, though leather and high quality, was gaudy as could be and held no less than two pads of paper, a slew of pens, a book, her wallet, spare stockings just in case the weather turned cold, keys to home and the office, and an economy sized bottle of aspirin along with other paraphernalia deemed essential. Satisfied, it would do for the night, the blonde's heels clicked as she walked out of the bedroom and down the hall in search of her date.

She found him, cozy as you please, in her wingback reading chair ensconced in a book of his own creation. A brow rose. "Really Jiraiya, are you so much of a narcissist, you chose your own book out of all the others in the room?"

He looked up from the book and immediately stood. If she didn't know better, she would have thought a blush of embarrassment was on his cheeks.

"Tsunade," The word crafter said, his voice strained. "You look… you look lovely."

"I expected you to say something perverted." She replied her eyes narrowed with suspicion.

"I live to surprise you. Let's go Princess of Editing, sooner we get back, sooner I can start writing the sequel of your dreams."


	3. Chapter 3

She had expected him to drive a sports cars, some phallic symbol of masculinity, but was surprised pleasantly so when he lead her to a late model SUV. It was clean and smelled faintly of cologne from the ride over. He had made sure of that, knowing she would have refused to ride in it otherwise. Tsunade frowned at the high lip and started to hike her dress up to step when large hands descended on her waist and lifted her to the seat.

"No point in you rucking up fabric, not when I can lift you just as easily." Jiraiya said making sure she was all the way in before shutting the door and rounding the hood. He got in, buckled up, and looked over at the now seething blonde.

"Tsunade… you're face is very pretty. I don't want to see it smashed against the windshield should the unfortunate happen. You need to buckle up."

Sherry colored eyes full of indignant anger looked at him before she snapped on the buckle. "I can't believe you did that."

He grinned unrepentant. "You're even lighter than I thought you would be, and it was my attempt at being a gentleman. You're legs are shapely and a sight to behold, but I'm sure you didn't want to flash them to the street."

Tsunade groaned. He was right, which was a pity. She liked a good mad. Her nose wrinkled with a frown before she relaxed against the seat. "I'm surprised you aren't driving some little sports car, you seem the type for it."

"Nah," The author replied as he pulled out into the evening traffic. "I'm too tall for little cars and I end up hauling around the kids so much, that I needed the extra room."

"Kids, I didn't realize you had any."

He grinned and considered letting her think the worse of him, but in the end relented. For some reason and Jiraiya wasn't going to look too close, he wanted Tsunade to see him as more than an erotica writer. He wanted her to if not like or at least not actively hate him.

"They aren't mine. I volunteer at a Dojo on the weekend and take the kids who don't have rides to practice and tournaments. Being in martial arts after all is what prompted me to write my first book. I like the idea of idealistic Shinobi and fighting for their respective Clans. Of course after that, I realized that ninja books don't sell and sex always does."

Tsunade kept her eyes on his profile. She had been his editor for nearly four years and knew his writing habits, penchant for messiness, the fact that he kept a string of woman around and absolutely nothing else. "You're a martial artist? I did kick boxing and Muay Thai in college, but stopped when I got my job at the publishing firm. I enjoyed it quite a bit."

"Hmmm… sounds like you would like the dojo I help out at. It's run by a buddy of mine. He and I were in Karate together and I told him I'd help out after he opened his own place. The weekends are blocked out for free classes to teach lower income families, so there is always a crowd."

They rode in silence the rest of the way to the hotel where the event was. Tsunade, not willing to risk him manhandling her again jumped out as soon as he stopped and the valet opened the door. He shook his head at her antics and walked around, passing off his keys and holding out his arm for her.

The blonde's lips twitched in a frown, even as she threaded her arm through his. "People are going to think we're a couple." Her voice hissed out. "I'm sure your fans wouldn't appreciate you being arm and arm with another woman."

He grinned and pulled her into the bustle of the event. Jiraiya wanted people to think they were a couple, wanted them to know that he was nearly smitten by the short tempered blonde at his side. It was a hell of a thing for him a lover of women in general to have his gaze focused on only one.

Conversation and wine flowed that night. Tsunade let herself enjoy the evening freely, likening it to Cinderella. She'd have fun and learn a bit more about this man who seemed to be more than just a pervert. After the ball was over, she'd go home, step out of her heels, and start planning for the sequel to Gusty Ninja.

It was surprising how much they talked, first about the Dojo and then about everything else. She talked about her brother, not the melancholy story of him dying but before that about their adventures as children and about how it felt to be raised by her grandparents. Tsunade talked more about her life in those scant hours than she had in years.

Jiraiya listened, keeping his tilted forward and dark eyes on her gold ones. He knew for sure now that he was smitten with her. Who wouldn't be? This brash woman who had been a loving big sister and talked of building bird houses with her grandfather. He could have sat there for the rest of the night, but the music had started and he very much wanted to touch her, just a hand on her hip to know that she wasn't some figment of his imagination brought to life the same way he did with writing.

"Will you dance with me my princess of editing?"

Tsunade laughed her cheeks red from the wine and, although she wouldn't admit it, the company as well. "I'm in four inch heels Jiraiya. Are you sure you want to risk it?"

He didn't speak but stood and held his hand out for hers in a silent ask. She took it and stood to sway around the dance floor with him. What was Cinderella's ball without a dance?

It was later, much later when he drove her home. Tsunade reached out a hand to touch his arm.

"Thank you. For inviting me I mean I've had a great time."

Jiraiya smiled as he watched the road. "Anything for you and I'll be true to my word. Next week, I start writing the sequel to the book you love so much."


	4. Chapter 4

The next week saw Tsunade, armed with coffee and donuts, knocking on his door at seven in the morning. Her mission was twofold, one she had paperwork that needed to be filed at the office before noon and she wanted to see if he had started on the book yet. The blonde knew, after her years in editing how could she not, that bugging writers was a sure fire way to have them slow or even stop writing altogether, hence why she came armed with coffee and his favored pastry.

She juggled the packages and knocked firmly on his door, waited and knocked again. Tsunade tapped a heeled foot and started to dig for her phone when the door was pulled back abruptly to reveal a sleep tousled author in nothing but ratty pajama pants. She swallowed hard at the sight of his abs. Jiraiya hadn't been kidding about his love of martial arts, his stomach was riddled with the dips and curves of his muscles. There wasn't even a hint of fat despite the rather sedentary life style of most authors.

"I ahhh… I just," her words stuttered to a stop when bleary eyes focused on the coffee in her hands. Jiraiya reached out for the Styrofoam and leaned against the doorjamb nonchalant in his half dressed state as he drank the caffeinated brew.

She tried again. "You're blocking the door Jiraiya. I have paperwork for you and even brought coffee as a peace offering for waking you up so early."

He lowered the cup and stepped back considering her and the light flush to her cheeks. "Doesn't the firm have runners for this sort thing." The author teased riling her up. "I mean, if it were something that had to be discussed of course you would come, but just signing off on paperwork, come on now Editing Princess. It's a bit beneath you."

Her lip curled into a snarl. "I have donuts. You can be nice and eat one or I can feed you the whole thing, bag and all."

He grinned unrepentant. "Yes ma'am."

Later as they sat, him on the couch and Tsunade in her favored chair, she thought about the other reason she was there. Red tipped fingers drummed on her half drunken coffee as she glanced to the side in a poor facade of ease. "I was just wondering, a bit about the book. I know it's early in the game."

Jiraiya had kept his eyes steady on hers; looking at her as a woman but also as the protagonist in the book he planned on writing and then dedicating to her. "Calm down Tsunade. You're going to give me writer's block. I already have started on the book. I'll let you read it when I'm done and not before."

She twitched her nose in annoyance, and reluctantly dropped the subject to focus on the paperwork that needed signed and the newest information from the Network that wanted to adapt one of his books and then to more personal things. Coffee and sweets were long gone as they walked about favorite movies and the music they liked. Tsunade had kicked off her heels to tuck her feet up and hadn't even thought of her responsibilities until the wall clock she'd gotten him as a gag gift last year chimed that it was noon.

Tsunade jerked up narrowing her eyes at him. "Damn it Jiraiya, I told you this paperwork had to be in house by midday."

He stood as well, towering over her. "Don't blame me for this. I can't help that I'm such pleasant company." Large hands dropped to her shoulders. "Tell them I was being a pest or whatever word it is you use when you complain about me. I'll be your scapegoat," he smiled, "just this once."

She tilted her head back. He really was despite his odd nature and deplorable habits, actually sweet gallant even. Unless… "If this is some ploy to butter me up, I won't have it. I'm a serious editor and a damn good literary agent. I'm not about to play your wingman or help your with any of your blasted research."

He sighed and moved the hands on her shoulders up to cup her face. It may have been over playing his hand, it certainly was a chancing bodily harm, but he was willing to risk it. Lips chapped and slightly sweet from the donut pressed against hers firmly.

The editor froze at the feel of his hands on her face and stopped her breath when his mouth touched hers. It was… She was… He had… Tsunade pushed him away and panted releasing her held breath. "How dare you. I'm not one of your floozies Jiraiya!" She yelled her face covered with a blush.

Long fingers came up to pinch his nose in frustration. "I don't think you are a floozy Tsunade. I kissed you because I like you. Although I'm not sure why, you are the prickliest person I've ever met."

The blonde strode forward, her hands reaching up to yank his hair and bring his face level with hers. "Why didn't you say so in the first place, idiot? I wouldn't have hit you."

Her painted lips were smeared slightly and this close to her, he could see each shoot of amber in her eyes. He was so mesmerized the words she was snarling didn't penetrate. "Wait, what?" Jiraiya asked blinking rapidly to clear his mind.

"Idiot, I said I like you too." With the words spoke, Tsunade kissed him and then bit his lower lip hard in retaliation. She left him there, a swaying tower of a man as she grabbed her shoes and left with the rest of her dignity.


	5. Chapter 5

They didn't speak of it. Even weeks later when they would meet again for the final signing of rights for the TV series, they didn't speak of the hurried kiss or her stomping out of his apartment, shoeless and filled with righteous fury. They didn't speak of her heels and the flowers he had delivered along with the blooms that now came every week.

Tsunade sat, pen tapping irritably as the lawyers talked about the ins and outs of the contract. Jiraiya had in typical lazy fashion signed over all video rights to his work, refusing to even consult on the material. His curt words being that some things were better left to paper and the imagination.

She didn't blame him, and even agreed to a point. His books read like plot fuelled pornography. She didn't see how that would translate well on screen, and she was sure he didn't mind the fat sum they were paying him for the right to butcher his works on screen.

"Princess," the words brought her out of her inner thoughts to see papers being shuffled as the lawyers stood and started to leave. Amber eyes glanced to the side to focus on the author. He had cleaned up well for the meeting, open polo shirt and pressed khakis, his hair for once neatly pulled back in a long pony tail down his back.

"Hmmm…"

Jiraiya let his eyes linger on her profile, wondering idly if she knew the effect she had on him or had sat where she was on purpose so that the blonde of her hair was highlighted by the fluorescent lighting and the puffs of central air let strands dance loose from her tight bun. He doubted it. She was effortless in her ability to enchant him.

"I was wondering if I could invite you out for lunch." The words were spoken on impulse. Even if she turned him down, at least she would speak to him. The thought had him flinching. Gods was he really that desperate for her interactions?

Painted lips quirked in amusement, she'd thought about him. Not just the normal thoughts of an editor and literary agent, but sweeter things, her mind replaying their conversations and in weaker moments the feel of his lips on hers. Tsunade had kept her distance, not wanting to rush and wary of his intentions. Lunch seemed a safe bet.

"I suppose I could spare an hour, maybe an hour and a half if you buy me an iced coffee as well as a sandwich."

Teeth glinted in a feral smile, a wolf springing his trap around the woman in the woods. Although a date not devouring was on his mind at the moment, maybe if the world smiled, a kiss from his editing princess as well.

"For you I'd even buy a Grande iced coffee with extra whipped cream."

She laughed and replied with a quip of her own as she stood and walked with him out of the room. They bantered back and forth all through the line at the local deli and Tsunade surprised herself by suggesting they eat lunch in the park.

The park bench passed over, the pair spread out on the grass under the shade of the trees. Stiletto heels were kicked off and her painted toes wiggled in the breeze. He watched it all, a bit in awe at the change from hardnosed business to soft woman with the taking off of shoes and sips of cold caffeine.

Tsunade twitched her nose. She needed to thank him for returning her shoes and for the flowers, but she felt awkward doing it. Her normal ability to barrel through obstacles had seemingly deserted her when it came to him.

"Thank you." She said dropping her gaze to her lap and the half eaten sandwich. "For getting my shoes back to me, I mean. I ahhh… tend to forget everything around me when I'm mad. I would have felt odd in my emergency flip flops all day."

"Were you mad then?" He responded tilting his head towards her. "Mad that I kissed you? I won't apologize for it, but I won't do it again if you don't want me to."

"I… you're an idiot Jiraiya." She said sharply to cover her embarrassment. "If I didn't want you to kiss me, I would have broke your nose instead of kissing you back. I thought authors were observers. You've proved me wrong on that account."

He pinched his nose at her sharp words and laughed in relief. She had the temper of a cornered cat, but Lord if he didn't enjoy trying to pet it. "Eat your sandwich Princess. I want to kiss you again, and I don't want you dropping it."

She blushed but ate her sandwich andfinished the coffee. When he kissed her, her lips were cold from it and she tasted like whip cream and the hint of bitter from her drink. Her manicured hand touched his cheek and let him taste his fill of her. They were in public. The kiss was completely chaste, but it still rocked her to her core and had her wishing they weren't out in the open.

When Tsunade pulled back from the meeting of mouths, she grinned as the faint sheen of red on his face. It was relief to know that he was as effected as she was and it made her flirty when she was normally demure. Shoes were slowly put back on and she stood lightly patting her butt to make sure there was no lingering grass on her skirt.

"I have to go back to work now. You should ask me out for this weekend though. I'd say yes to a movie and even buy the popcorn for it."

She leaned forward then and pressed her lips to his cheek, thankful he hadn't come out of his stupor enough to stand and have his face out of reach. At the brush of her lips, the author focused and gave her a searching look as he stood.

"I'll be sure to ask you on a proper date Tsunade. Dinner, a movie, and I'll even walk you home to your door at the end of the night. Say Friday, I'll pick you up from the office?"

"I'll look forward to it."


End file.
